Perhaps it’s a little late to start my Met Ball Red Carpet Rundown. What can I say though – this was the largest collection of A-listers since The Oscars (better than The Oscars, in fact) and I’m only just recovering from being totally wowed by the couture on show. And that’s a nice way of saying that I have no idea what the Met Ball/Costume Institute Gala is actually meant to be for or to do other than to showcase pretty dresses. Here goes…
Maggie Gyllenhaal in Louis Vuitton – This was my favourite. I love how Gyllenhaal is so brave when it comes to her red carpet choices; she has her own style, sticks to it and doesn’t give a damn what others make of it. So whilst others bemoan the bin bag styling or complain her boobs look squished, I just think the dress itself is a beautiful architectural masterpiece and Maggie looks utterly fearless and fabulous. So there.
Thandie Newton in Vivienne Westwood – This is another dress that not many people seem to like but that I LOVE. Yes, in caps. Firstly, I can’t resist a bit of Dame Viv and this dress comes complete with her trademark ultra-flattering ruching. Secondly, I can’t resist a bit of purple, as was evident from me loving Sandra Bullock’s Quality Street wrapper moment. If I wanted any dress from the event, it was this one.
Rachel Bilson in Louis Vuitton – There really is no pleasing some people. This dress is obviously stupidly cute/pretty/gorgeous and still critics complained it ‘wasn’t event-appropriate’. Well, in my books, pretty dress = any event appropriate. I adore the romantic print and muted colours of this dress and the shape is so girlie and flattering to La Bilson. Who I love ridiculous amounts anyway. Now someone please give her a tv show so I can moon over her cute-as-a-button face on a weekly basis rather than looking like an obsessive by Googling her far too frequently.
Coca Rocha in Zac Posen – Everytime I declared a favourite, a new dress came along that knocked it out of the water. This Zac Posen creation was like all my mermaid fantasies got rolled into one and emerged as a beautiful frothy cascade of dreams. The colours are just mesmerising. We have a show-stopper, people – even if I have no idea who Rocha is and thought that was the name of that woman from The Kenny Everett Show.
Jennifer Lopez in Zuhair Murad; Anne Hathaway in Valentino – Every event needs a princess dress and Lopez and Hathaway duly obliged. And yes, Anne looked very pretty in shimmering cream, but when doesn’t she?! It’s a look she’s done countless times before so her looking lunar and milky and stunning is no surprise. Lopez’s face is desperately trying to bring the sex to this ballgown but it’s the beautifully beaded embroidery that makes this dress better than Hathaway’s. Hathaway’s was just random glitter – my kindergarten kids can scatter sequins liberally – but human hands probably bled to create the amazing leaf-shapes on Lopez’s gown. It’s for the sacrifice of human hands that I’m compelled to plump for Princess Jennifer on this occasion.
Mila Kunis in Vera Wang – Dear Vera, I want you to design my wedding dress (well, you’ll have to fight it out with Carolina Herrera). Obviously, I don’t want this dress as my wedding dress but it illustrates the reasons I’m a Wang fan. It’s belle of the ball stuff, with soft reams of netting and tulle, dramatic but romantic. Doesn’t hurt that Mila is almost as cute as Rachel Bilson… *feels another girl crush coming on* PS I love that Cleo Rocha’s train is visible in the background of this photo; let’s face it, it was so huge, there probably aren’t many photos where it’s not peeping in!
Naomi Watts in Stella McCartney – Just to prove a dress doesn’t have to be voluminous to be among my favourites, this McCartney gown is stunning. It’s all about the colour, a rich jewel-like cerise that looks amazing set against Naomi’s ivory complexion, blonde hair and classy lippie. I’ve just worked out why I love this dress so much – it’s the carbon copy of one of my favourite Barbie dresses from my Barbie sticker books that I loved so much I got my Mum to draw it for me several times. From the colour to that one-shoulder fan detail; I guess Stella had it when she was a kid too. I’m onto you, McCartney (and expect a Jem & The Holograms inspired collection next)!
Gwen Stefani in LAMB – The last of my batch of unadulterated ‘love it’s pales in comparison to most of the colours, spangles, flounces and trains seen elsewhere. But it’s Gwen Stefani and I’m morally bound by my idolatry of her to think everything she does is totally like… awesome. I love the simplicity of this glimmering pool of gold married with little edgy touches that befit the fact that Gwen rocks. Namely the visible underwear, somehow carried off without being tacky, and the delicate cobweb-by shoulder thing. All set off with Gwen’s usual retro-glam platinum hair and slash of scarlet lipstick.